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ancer treatments can bring delays or setbacks in children’s development. Side effects will depend on what type of cancer your child has, what treatment they are on and how they respond to it. Many families report delays in cognitive and physical growth. I noticed speech was developing much slower for my toddler with cancer than it had with my older sons. He also stopped walking independently when chemotherapy began. His physical body seemed to shrink rather than grow taller and stronger.

Set a Foundation for Learning

Emotional and physical trauma (like from battling cancer) can make it hard for a child to want to learn academically. Don’t expect things to carry on exactly as if nothing is happening because something huge is. However, cushioning the blows is possible with a lot of effort and support to help remain on the track. Fred Rogers from Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood discussed six “necessities” required to be ready to learn. These include foundations such as a sense of self-worth, curiosity and daily time alone. Read more about these important foundations here to help your child grow. This is for siblings too, who may not be growing as much when so much of your energy is being poured out already. Similar to Montessori learning, this sets the stage for them to grow and you don’t have to be as hands on as you would think for them to thrive.

Get Professional Assistance

Ask about any physical, occupational or speech therapy your child may be able to receive. Doctors don’t always suggest this, but you can. I used to think my son would just re-learn these skills one day but once he started occupational and physical therapy, he made much faster progress. They can show you the cayse of the delays and tell you what to do to help those specific weaknesses. No need to work on these items just once a week either. See if you can get similar resources to use at home to keep practicing what was learned throughout the week.

Set Aside Time to Build Skills

Language was something we worked on everyday. Learning sign language was actually a huge help with building vocabulary for us. We then knew when he wanted water or was hungry, which was absolutely critical for a cancer patient. It doesn’t just teach hand signs either. By teaching sign language, we also slowed down and intentionally taught verbal language at the same time. My son used verbal words and sign at the same time after we started this.

The Treeschool Preschool and Kid Songs You Tube channel is amazing for teaching a variety of sign words from foods (we loved using this one) to scientific concepts like photosynthesis and they do it all through song! Kids get to watch other kids sign and they will love watching it over and over again until they learn it. I preferred Tree school to other signing videos because the repetition, music and images helps with learning and the videos were grouped into useful topics like foods, feelings and health. For older kids or teens looking for helpful phrases, Signed with Heart has great lessons on Instagram.

Final Takeaway

Whatever you notice is helping your children grow, try to make a habit of doing it at the same time every day or every week to really see them progress. Even during a very difficult time, your children can still grow developmentally and emotionally by setting the stage for success and then following through regularly. What helped delays during treatment for you? Share a comment or join in the daily conversations in our Cancer Kids Resources group

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ood is a major cost when time and energy is cut short for cooking and more meals come from takeout or delivery. There are some easy ways that you, as a helpful community, can take some of this burden off of them. Mealtrain.com is a free site that makes it easy to coordinate meal drop offs with your village. The main organizer can check in with the family to find out the best time for meals, preferred foods and any allergies to be aware of. Then you can share the calendar through text, email or social media. Everyone picks a day that works for them to drop off a meal or donate a gift card.

This was super helpful for my family and we had extended relatives, strangers, and church family all signed up on the same sheet via social media. We appreciated meals that were cooked or delivered. Cooking good meals while constantly holding my needy toddler was a task so this went along way. Another option is signing them up for Lasagna Love. This is a volunteer site and neighbors bring a lasagna once per month to those signed up. You can sign up as a volunteer while you sign them up if you like! I had some of the best lasagna of my life through this! Whatever you can do, will be so appreciated. This really makes life easier!

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hen several different medicines were needed to be given over and over again, day and night, it was hard remembering if I had already given a certain medication or what time it had been. Well, except for the pain meds, you can tell with those. Some medications are needed only on weekends, some are needed at night, some every three hours, and some every four. I was so thankful when my husband showed me this app!

An app called “Medisafe” lets you put in the medication that is needed, including what days, what times and what dose. It then alarms you whenever it is time to give each medication. You can also connect people to the account so they can also give you a reminder if you happen to shut it off before you get to it. If someone else is watching your child and able to give meds, they can be added to the list and know what to give. 

This app also gives you information about what each medicine does, how it works and if it has any additional side effects when combined with other medications.

What are your top tips for managing meds? Please share them in our community group! We would love to hear from you.

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ne parent at home taking kids back and forth to school and activities, the other parent at the hospital keeping track of symptoms and talking to doctors. Maybe one parent is working, while the other is giving meds on schedule. Or perhaps one parent is overwhelmed with stress or depression, and the other parent is focused on keeping the family happy. Not to mention, these things can change by the month or even by the day! So how do we keep the family feeling united in a time of chaos? Here are some tips.

Family Night

If you don’t have one yet, you don’t know what you’re missing until you try. Pick a day of the week that your family will spend together- watching a movie, playing a board game, having a bible study, going on a walk, etc. Every week that everyone is home, you do that activity. For us, we did a video devotional and a movie while we had pizza, popcorn and carrots every Friday. Many weeks we missed it due to hospital stays but when we could, it was such a joy for everyone and we all look forward to it.

Video Chat

During times of separation, make an effort to keep updated as parents everyday through a call and texts throughout the day. Video chats are especially helpful for kids to feel connected to siblings and the other parent when everyone can’t be together. Making a time everyday to do this may be hard due to different schedules but there is definitely something powerful to seeing faces as well as hearing voices. We only made the effort sometimes to video chat but calling everyday was a must for us and helped a TON with relieving stress and feeling like partners.

Build on Strengths and Availability

Make something great out of your family’s ingredients. What can everyone bring? Attentiveness, routine, joy, fun, peace, finances, support systems, faith, research, resources, encouragement, etc. Everyone has a position to hold when under deadly fire. Of course, everyone will bring their weaknesses too and everyone requires time and energy to stay afloat. This complicates the battle plan but get one together and modify as you go. Plan to succeed!

Focus on Faith

God was our support, day in and day out. One phone call while sitting in a hospital bed most of the day only goes so far. Is a few texts really enough while you’re suddenly feeding, bathing and transporting kids between work calls and worried about what’s happening at the hospital? One family night out of seven nights a week makes a difference but will it carry you the distance? I’d be wrong not to share my greatest help. A relationship with God gave me continuous support and still does even after our loss.

Keeping the family united through a cancer journey gives a peace, joy, and confidence. If, you’ve been on this journey, what are some tips you have?

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his is a situation when social media really has the power to shine and make a difference in someone’s life. How can you use it as a caring community member?

Love/Care/Share

First, smash that love button! Let the family know they matter to you by showing you care about the extreme pain they are facing. You could also follow it up with a sympathetic comment. I was one of the many fb users who used to share moments of my life throughout every week to the response of 0-10 people out of my hundreds of “friends”. Suddenly, after sharing our horrific, breath stopping news, people were coming out of the woodwork to show they sympathized. It seems so small but that’s why I’m telling you, it really does make a difference. It was like “What? John and Jane Doe really care?? After they ignored all of my birthdays and anniversaries, I thought our connection was over! Now they are praying for me.” Life is made up of little moments too, you know.

Prayer/Thoughts

Speaking of prayer, letting the family know you have them covered can really go straight to the soul if prayer is important to them. You can probably tell if it would be meaningful to them based on what you know of them and even non-religious families often appreciate the sentiment during tough times. For me and many others I know, just knowing that hundreds of people were praying for my child’s health and recovery brought tears of gratitude. Triple folded hands is okay but the short prayer written in the comments went further. My soul was strengthened and I was confident God’s mercy would follow us. If that’s not for you, you could also share that they are in your thoughts or follow up with a direct message letting them know you are there.

Donate Meals or Money

If you do only the things above, thank you! You may never hear it from the receiver when there is a lot on their plate and heart but don’t be discouraged. If it’s on your heart to go further, social media has ways to make caring for physical needs during a childhood cancer journey easier than before. You can share updates, fundraisers, and or meal trains.

I was literally BLOWN away by the generosity of our community. Like I said, I could barely get a dozen likes on my posts, year after year. I was too shy to even dare ask for help. My husband put a fundraiser out there one time and somehow people found it month after month, asked for it, and shared it. We traveled out of state for a top surgeon to remove 75% of our son’s liver and needed to stay there almost two months. Their generosity allowed us to make it there, feed ourselves, and make sure our other kids were cared for. It helped while I couldn’t work to care for our baby. It helped keep our house together when we were stretched thin during our personal nightmare AND a national pandemic at the same time.  I could go on and on. I will always remain extremely grateful for everyone’s generosity and especially the completely unexpected.

Final Takeaways

My perspective comes from a cancer journey that began during a national pandemic (which my husband took seriously), hours away from the nearest relative and in between churches so social media was extra meaningful. I’m not saying don’t have actual drop ins, hugs and meals together. There IS value to social media support, though, for those who may not know it and every little bit helps. My heart is warm just knowing there are people out there who want to know how to help others during their horrible situations. It isn’t everyone but for those who are brave enough, I believe you are showing humanity at it’s finest. You’re appreciated and keep loving!

What are your thoughts about social media during a cancer journey? We welcome you to share them in our community group!