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ne parent at home taking kids back and forth to school and activities, the other parent at the hospital keeping track of symptoms and talking to doctors. Maybe one parent is working, while the other is giving meds on schedule. Or perhaps one parent is overwhelmed with stress or depression, and the other parent is focused on keeping the family happy. Not to mention, these things can change by the month or even by the day! So how do we keep the family feeling united in a time of chaos? Here are some tips.

Family Night

If you don’t have one yet, you don’t know what you’re missing until you try. Pick a day of the week that your family will spend together- watching a movie, playing a board game, having a bible study, going on a walk, etc. Every week that everyone is home, you do that activity. For us, we did a video devotional and a movie while we had pizza, popcorn and carrots every Friday. Many weeks we missed it due to hospital stays but when we could, it was such a joy for everyone and we all look forward to it.

Video Chat

During times of separation, make an effort to keep updated as parents everyday through a call and texts throughout the day. Video chats are especially helpful for kids to feel connected to siblings and the other parent when everyone can’t be together. Making a time everyday to do this may be hard due to different schedules but there is definitely something powerful to seeing faces as well as hearing voices. We only made the effort sometimes to video chat but calling everyday was a must for us and helped a TON with relieving stress and feeling like partners.

Build on Strengths and Availability

Make something great out of your family’s ingredients. What can everyone bring? Attentiveness, routine, joy, fun, peace, finances, support systems, faith, research, resources, encouragement, etc. Everyone has a position to hold when under deadly fire. Of course, everyone will bring their weaknesses too and everyone requires time and energy to stay afloat. This complicates the battle plan but get one together and modify as you go. Plan to succeed!

Focus on Faith

God was our support, day in and day out. One phone call while sitting in a hospital bed most of the day only goes so far. Is a few texts really enough while you’re suddenly feeding, bathing and transporting kids between work calls and worried about what’s happening at the hospital? One family night out of seven nights a week makes a difference but will it carry you the distance? I’d be wrong not to share my greatest help. A relationship with God gave me continuous support and still does even after our loss.

Keeping the family united through a cancer journey gives a peace, joy, and confidence. If, you’ve been on this journey, what are some tips you have?